Stephanie Webb Asks "What If It’s Not Mindset? It’s Misalignment "

“Steph, you just have to change your mindset.”

I tried. I really did.

It was 2022 and I had signed up with an MLM to do some network marketing, otherwise known as “affiliate marketing”. This was an opportunity for me to work from home and to work on my own terms. It came at a time when I was stuck as I had some health challenges and was unable to find work that fit for me and for what I was able to handle. 

This excited me. Until it didn’t. I started to feel uncomfortable and not sure if this was really for me.

I was excited because of the training videos I was given to watch and the online community that was cheering us all on to greater success. I was so motivated for the first few weeks. But then I experienced procrastination and complacency. I felt lost and stuck. I needed that inspiration from the community constantly to remind me why I should be excited for this. And when I couldn’t motivate myself, I was told it had to do with my mindset. I needed to think more positively and believe in myself that I could do it. It is mind over matter, and I just needed to be more positive about it.

I was working on the mindset and motivation as I was also still walking a very painful part of my healing journey. It was too much pressure, and I found no joy in the community or in the products or in what I was doing.

I went through a rough period that year, unsure of my next steps and what I could possibly do. What was so wrong with me that I couldn’t be as excited or motivated as the other people who loved the MLM and its products?

The answer is ALIGNMENT! It was not meant for me. 

Don’t get me wrong. Changing our perspective and mindset is incredibly important; it can be the difference in whether we see opportunities instead of problems and in loving our life or being miserable in it. But changing our mindset isn’t the only focus. Sometimes what we are doing is just not meant for us. We can be grateful for it while we also move on.

I worked at a bank call center for 7 years, leaving that position in 2019. I was miserable for most of that time as it was not only incredibly stressful, but I was exhausted, overwhelmed and overstimulated. I also complained a lot! People would remind me to be grateful because “at least you have a job”. And then I felt guilty because I was thinking of all those people who didn’t have what I had. However, I realized it was not suitable for me.  To be honest, I was confused about what I should be feeling.

Now that I’ve had time to contemplate and understand, I know the difference was in both mindset and alignment. Although the job was challenging and not the best match for my skills, my dislike for it worsened the situation.  That job taught me so much and it was needed for my growth. I learned how to be comfortable speaking with people, handling challenging questions and situations. I also learned to be comfortable listening to my own voice. I didn’t know it at the time, but this was preparing me to start podcasting and mentoring people. 

What I learned through that experience is that it is a “yes…and” situation. YES, I can be grateful for what I have AND it might not be the best option and I want to look for a more aligned solution.

I could have enjoyed that experience and found less resistance if I had a more positive perspective, was grateful for it and changed my mindset about it. As well as recognizing it was not fully in alignment with who I was. That alignment would eventually come about as I moved forward in growth and understanding myself.