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Ever wondered about mealtimes? What they are, why they are, how many there are? No, you probably haven't, but that isn't going to prevent us from sending you down a rabbit hole leaving you utterly bewildered as to when you would find the time to fit them all in, or indeed perplexed how anyone actually can do them all.
Do you know how many there are? Nope, more than that; technically there's up to twelve of them. Twelve! That's one every two hours of every day, which is insane - I appreciate that we probably all know one person who attempts this or would if they could, and if you can't think of someone, then that means that person is you.
But behind every meal is a story, an etymology if you will, so come on, that rabbit hole is a-waitin'.
Breakfast. Essentially you are breaking your fast. You haven't eaten all night and you need to insert food into your face. But what food? When? Why?
They say it's the most important meal of the day, due to replenishing the mind and body, and getting you right for a day of work or study. But history says it depends upon the type of work you do. We know of the Full English Breakfast, an often gargantuan meal served immediately upon waking up, which came about to give manual labourers fuel for the body to keep going all day, or at least last until the evening meal.
These days though, Breakfast can consist of that or nothing, a coffee, cereal, yogurt, pastries, fruit, toast, bacon sandwich, rice, noodles, soup, pancakes, and so on. But the basic premise is the same: between waking up and within two hours of awaking, a meal to set you up for the day ahead (unless you skip it completely).
Second Breakfast. We have already entered Hobbit territory here. This meal is particularly useful if your Breakfast was especially early, and you are already feeling hungry around 9am.
If this keeps happening you probably should be having a larger Breakfast, but as they say, 'eat little and often', why bother when you could just have two Breakfasts?
Elevenses. Ideally this would be instead of your second Breakfast, but you had that two hours ago, and Lunch is an eternity away, so Elevenses it is. It is supposed to consist of a very light snack - fruit or some such - just to keep you going, but if you fancy a burger, who am I to tell you not to?
Brunch. Chefs hate this meal, and therefore will hate you for making them do it. It started during the late 1800s in England, and eventually took hold in the US in the 1930s. It has spread around the World, particularly in the English speaking parts, but it is a weird one.
Partaking in a late morning Brunch (and therefore partaking in the chef's wrath), means you have skipped Breakfast and are not planning on bothering with Lunch either. It's kind of a big-ish meal but a light one, and is predominantly for the realms of the well off.
Did you sleep in late? Couldn't bothered with toast? Will Lunch get in the way of your tennis lesson or clothes shopping with Rachel this afternoon? Yup, you are sooooo a Brunch person.
Lunch. Ah, yes, we all know this one; some time between 11am and 3pm a decent meal but nothing too over the top, and neither will it be too heavy, for we probably still have work to get done. In certain parts of the World it may even include a pint or a glass of wine with it.
That is important to remember here because most of these meals were set in stone decades or centuries ago, and the World doesn't work like that any more. Working at night was pretty much unheard of long ago unless you were a town guard. Your social class dictated the times you worked, ergo it dictated your mealtimes and the meals.
Afternoon Tea. Speaking of class systems, if you worked in mines, factories, or farms this mealtime was definitely not for you. Small sandwiches, cakes, pastries, pots of tea; that's what the rich and posh folk are having, and you and your grubby uncouth ways are not invited to this mid afternoon event.
Linner. Stupid name I know, but it's apparently a thing, and yes it is exactly what you think it is.
But when do you have this bastardised meal? As the name suggests, after midday but before the evening; think of it as an excuse to have another Lunch the greedy bas-
Dinner. Another meal we all recognise, or do we? Yes, this, too, has changed over the years. Aside from the fact that in some parts of the World, and particularly in certain parts of the UK, it is called Tea, it used to consist of a minimum of three courses but could easily extend to five and above.
To do this every day, one would be required to have money and go to a restaurant, or have money and get the in-house cook to make it. Basically you needed to have money.
These days it is typically served after 5pm and before 8pm, and is a large cooked meal; you've been working hard all day "up in t' mill" or "on t' lands" and you deserve something hearty because that giant Breakfast was an eternity ago and your gut lining is now being consumed by your stomach.
High Tea. We are not even getting close to bed and yet here we are sitting down to another meal. A cold platter of meats and cheeses - a posh person's Ploughman's Lunch (an afternoon meal served to farm workers of cold farmyard produce) - smaller than Dinner, larger than Supper.
Supper. All that food, all those meals and yet your inner Hobbit still cries out for more. This is where Supper fits in, but it is supposed to be something small, something that won't keep your stomach too busy during the night.
Maybe a sandwich? Possibly a small bowl of rice? A giant 18" supreme meat lovers stuffed crust pizza with a side order of garlic bread, cheese poppers, and a box of cookies? You know which you are.
Slu Yeh. This one is primarily the remit of southern mainland China, and is served anywhere between 9pm and 4am. It is a small light meal, so smaller than Dinner, larger than Supper, but also smaller than High Tea. The next time someone asks why you are eating again because they thought you already had Supper, you can tell tell them, "Yes, that was Supper, this is Slu Yeh".
Midnight Breakfast/Snack. This is a very modern invention. Can't sleep? Studying throughout the night? Been out partying? Got the munchies because you're stoned? This mealtime has your back.
It's a middle of the night Brunch if you will, and also why that greasy takeaway place exists and is never open during the day.
And there we have it, your twelve mealtimes in the day. Every. Day. Of course this is all very much a First World/Rich Person's problem.
How many you do, and how many you would like to do is a you thing, but at least you are now better informed as to every major mealtime available to you.
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